Over the last number of years, I have been on a journey. It took me quite some time to realise I was, and even longer to make my peace with it. For many years, possibly as far back as my teens, my body has been struggling with processing certain foods, and simply out of ignorance, and a lack of information, I did nothing about it. I didn't recognise what was happening.
I had been a vegetarian since the age of 11 or 12, and I was interested in wholefoods and healthy living, thanks to my mother, but, while that gave me a good platform to be jumping from, it wasn't enough, and I didn't know that then.
But along comes the internet, and a whole new world opens up, a world where people can share information so easily, it astounds the mind. Information on whatever it is you need, or want, to know.
And so, things began to trickle into my awareness, and unbeknownst to myself, I began this journey. I began to recognise myself in things other people were writing about. I began to recognise that I could not continue to eat without awareness, to abuse my body like that, and not have some serious consequences to deal with down the road. Consequences that were far worse than weight gain, bloatedness, tiredness, brain fog, headaches, nausea, indigestion, and other minor discomforts. When I look at that list, I am mystified as to how I lived with that for so many years, but I did, until gradually, around the time I was expecting my third child, ten years ago, I realised I couldn't any longer. I had three young children, and I wanted to heal myself, for myself, for them, and I also wanted to know why, and how. How to avoid this happening to them. But I had no idea how to go about healing myself, and I quickly realised my doctor was of no help. And if he couldn't help me heal my body, who could?
And then I knew. It was me. I had to do this myself. I knew, somewhere inside me, what I needed. I just had to learn to listen, and to read, and keep presenting possibilities to myself to see if I recognised it as a truth for me. By the time my fourth child was born, three years later, I felt like I had one leg hitched on a wagon I couldn't really figure out how to jump onto fully, let alone steer! But then something changed, and slowly but surely, it began to happen. The more I read, the more empowered I became, the more I understood what I need to do. And while it was, at times, daunting, it soon became clear that things that seem difficult at first, soon become easy, and even, sometimes, a joy.
So, where I am now, another six years down the road, is this: For the last five years I haven't eaten processed sugar, and very little other sugars, or gluten, apart from oats. A year ago, I gave up dairy, and more recently eggs, and I am now pretty much vegan. I admit, this is a lot to carry. It makes eating out reasonably doable, but eating in a friends house very awkward, and I do compromise when that happens!
Obviously all of this means that my focus is very much on what food is prepared in my kitchen, and what we eat as a family. I still feel like I am groping around in the dark, quite a bit, and I still have days when it all goes to pot, sometimes spectacularly. But as time goes by I feel like I am getting the hang of it. However, I am cooking for a family, and while they are slowly converting to a cleaner, more plant-based diet, (some quicker than others!) a lot of my recipes and meal ideas here will include options for meals they are all happy to eat, and a variation for those more hardcore like me. So I hope there is something for everyone here, however far along this road you might be.
I am so extremely grateful to all those people out there who are sharing their journeys, their information, their recipes. And so, I feel ready to do the same. And if it helps one of you out there to do the same, then I'm happy.
But, I am not perfect.
I'm not a professional foodie, or a professional photographer, nor am I a food stylist, though I wish I was all of the above. You won't find images worthy of a magazine spread. And while I've been practising yoga for a number of years now, which has helped hugely with keeping me mindful about how I treat my body, and what I put into it, I have not done a single sun-salutation all summer. I don't always remember to drink my two litres of water every day. Here, you won't find a perfect body and a perfect yoga practice, or a perfectly executed diet, but you will find intention. And you will find mindful awareness of how we treat ourselves, along with the frailties and faults of human nature when we try. And I can promise you recipes, trials and experiments and a willingness to share all of these with you.
I welcome feedback, and your stories. My aim and intention here, is to create a community, a place to be imperfect, but full of intention. The best kind of intention to be good to ourselves, and to allow our bodies to heal themselves.
Ciara
With love from The Garden of Ireland
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